Saturday, February 28, 2009

The End

5 pm yesterday officially marked the end of my maternity leave. How fast it has flown by. Looking at her now, I am still astounded at how much she's grown. In front of my very eyes. There are times when I'll scratch my head and wonder, how did she get so big? My baby is not so much a baby anymore. Even though I was with her every single one of those days, I feel like I missed something. And I'll wish that there was a rewind button somewhere for me to be able to relive those days, to experience it all over again, to ensure that I didn't miss a single second of it. And it makes me wish that none of that time was wasted with the unimportant things.
She goes to daycare on Monday. As I watched her sleep tonight, I started calculating. She'll be spending more time with the teachers at the daycare than with my husband and I. And then I started bawling. What if through time, she starts preferring them? Will she forget me? Right now, I'm the one she wants when she's really upset, tired, etc. What if there comes a time in the near future when she's crying out for comfort but she doesn't want it from me? Please say it isn't so. I wouldn't be able to bear it, my heart would break.
I miss her already.

2 comments:

Jenny said...

your baby will always be your baby.Even when she gets to be your age.You used to go to A.Teh's hse too and I still think our relationship is good and intimate.Do you think so too?

bagfashionista said...

look at you, all tech savvy now!! ;)

yeah, yea,....but she's soooooooo young still. I want to baby her more. I'll just have to settle making kissy faces at her photos on my wall at work